5 Ways to Save Yourself from Blind Exuberance | Hold Your Horses

Nothing beats it–that heart-pumping excitement that comes from the prospect of:

• Landing a great job or promotion
• Getting an overseas assignment
• Buying into a promising start up

Our minds are flooded with seductive images of what we can make happen.

That’s all good, except, to be successful, we need to be in touch with our naiveté, replacing it with solid knowledge .

Face what you don’t know.

It’s easy to get sold a bill of goods:

• The job description isn’t what the job is
• The promotion is a dead end, not a growth opportunity
• The start-up was poorly managed so it folded

Our exuberance for an opportunity is often rooted in our emotions, so we’re inclined to make our decisions based on incomplete information.

Career opportunities are, first and foremost, business decisions, so they require the same due diligence as any corporate merger. Your life is your business, remember?

I’ve certainly had plenty of experience reining in my own boundless exuberance throughout my varied career..

I learned the hardest lessons as a race and show horse breeder. My knowledge of the industry was zero before I started. (There’s your first sign!) I’d learned to ride as an adult, did a little showing on my first horse, bought a broodmare, and then a small farm that needed to be made horse-ready. Next I met a work colleague into horse racing and “I was off.”

This experience taught me these five lessons for any career move :

1. Understand the economics: Calculate the hard dollar benefits and exposures over time for any career change you make. Discuss this openly and without discomfort.

I learned: Horses are expensive even when you take care of them yourself: feed, vet care, farriers, trainers, gear, trailering, and endless supplies. There’s no escaping the cost.

2. Assess the physical demands: Be honest about whether or not you are up to the demands of the job over the long haul–the hours, the stress, the travel, the expectations.

I learned: Horses are work every day all year: lugging, lifting, stacking, dodging, restraining, and getting dragged around (mostly by foals). Hurting is a constant.

3. Face your emotions: Determine the level of your self-confidence and self-esteem, tolerance for criticism and disappointment, anticipating exposures that lie ahead.

I learned: Horses die, get severely injured, and often lack needed talent. Making the decision to euthanize a beloved sick or severely injured horse was tormenting. Learning to face reality is one thing; acting on it another.

4. Study the players: Dig into what’s driving your opportunity and who the beneficiaries are if you particpate. Ask probing questions about expectations, authority, and the key players.

I learned: Commercial horse breeding is an industry. Every product (horse) is one of a kind. If you don’t know how to sell or buy, it’s easy to get cheated. And I was, more than once.

5. Analyze the market:  Examine the path ahead and what it will take to get there. Your coworkers and others are also competing for available opportunities, so position yourself for the future. Don’t jump at just anything.

I learned: Horses aren’t easy to sell. The market is glutted, many buyers are clueless, games can be played, and seller “celebrity” often rules. Selling privately is different from selling at auction. In this game, it’s every horseman for him/herself.

Hold your horses.

We all need passion and drive to be successful. That’s how we weather the storms of disappointment and fuel our resilience.

No matter what career you’re in, there are cold hard realities that need to be grasped, managed, and overcome to achieve and advance.

I can remember every “beating” I took in the horse business. Each one left both a welt on my psyche along with a priceless gem of understanding. Some lessons I learned after one whack and others after many. In time, I was able to anticipate the obstacles and side-step them before they got me. I wouldn’t swap the experience and all the joy and excitement for anything.

These lessons are where business savvy comes from. Once you’ve got your arms around them, you can act on your exuberance with confidence. YAY!

3 Problems Solved with a Little Respect | Managing Relationships

Pro athletes are famous for grumbling to the media about players or teams saying, “They don’t respect us.” The words become a kind of call to arms. Sports commentators run the clips repeatedly to stoke what promises to be pending conflict. Then we tune in. 

Disrespect happens to us too. We all bring our dignity to work and expect to be treated respectfully. When we aren’t, we get our backs up. 

Self-esteem sensitivity 

Feeling disrespected is about hurt self-esteem, affronts to self-worth, and lack of deference. It’s personal and can be deep. 

If your response is, “Oh, come on, now,” think of situations where you’ve been offended, intentionally or not, by someone at work. 

Your reaction will likely be more intense if the person who disrespected you: 

• Had done it repeatedly
• Was someone you trusted/confided in
• Was your boss or higher
• Should have known better
• Was trying to undercut you

Our challenge is to defuse disrespect toward us while also avoiding disrespectful behaviors of our own. 

Respect disarms perceptions of disrespect 

Sometimes we find ourselves branded as disrespectful and need to use a little respect to solve the problem. Here are a few to consider: 

1. Your boss is insulted by your apparent disinterest in his/her project. 

Start showing respect by arriving early for project meetings, paying serious attention during discussions (which means staying off your mobile device and/or laptop), asking pertinent questions, and responding to requests. 

2. Your coworkers are frustrated because you routinely interrupt them. 

Not letting others speak may seem like you’re demeaning their ideas and considering yourself superior. Launch dialogue with your coworkers by asking questions. Validate what’s said and then add your ideas to the mix. Continue to engage everyone until a consensus is reached. 

3. Coworkers think you don’t like them. 

If you use a dismissive tone of voice, fail to acknowledge others, ignore their overtures, speak impolitely, or criticize openly, your coworkers will feel disrespected. Offering a greeting, engaging in casual conversation, being courteous, and recognizing achievement are ways to show your respect that build positive relationships. 

No respect…No progress 

Lack of respect is no trivial matter. Showing it establishes us as being both professional and desirable as a colleague. 

Signs of respect are in simple things like coming to work dressed appropriately, using polite speech, and showing regard for the leadership whether you agree with all their decisions or not. 

I remember being horrified when, at the senior VP’s staff meeting, one of his vice presidents assaulted him with searing language (including a string of ef-bombs) about a decision he’d made. The senior VP just sat there and took it, not succumbing to the provocation, but red-faced nonetheless. 

Even though the majority of the staff was also against the senior VP’s decision, that display of disrespect was so appalling that it shut down all discussion. 

That’s the consequence of disrespect. It becomes a barrier to progress. When we feel disrespected by someone, we can’t hear what they have to say. So we set up emotional roadblocks that are impenetrable. 

Win with respect 

Feeling respected as a human being, an employee, and a coworker can have a powerful positive effect on any relationship. Showing respect even when at odds keeps the door open and the opportunities for collaboration alive.

Respect doesn’t cost us anything. Actually, showing respect for others demonstrates the respect we have for ourselves. 

Acting respectfully is a behavior we control. It’s an asset to our personal brand and to our careers. It’s another winning career behavior. Try it. You’ll like it.

Photo from Dyanna via Flickr

10 Career Risks of the Sleep-Deprived. You?

Sleep is for wimps. Do some people make you feel that way? Time to refute!                           

We’ve become a tired workforce, exhausted even. We work long hours, stay up late for household chores/family time and/or to socialize with friends. When we lay down to sleep, we often can’t or the quality is poor. 

Sleep matters. 

Sometimes we treat sleep like it’s an accessory, not a necessity, to our success.

 Ben Stein, commentator on economic, political, and social issues, recently (3/20/11) did a segment about sleep on the CBS Sunday Morning program. He quoted Dr. Frank Knight, economist from the University of Chicago during the 1930s, 40s, and 50s who said: 

“Never waste any time you can spend sleeping.”

Stein talks about all the time we spend focusing on eating well and exercising, but then don’t commit to sleep, something that rejuvenates us with literally no effort. Not sleeping, Stein says, “cheats our bodies and our minds.” When Stein thinks “sleep,” he starts with 10 hours a night not eight or six! 

Sleep-deprivation has its costs. 

The first smart move of business fitness is to stay well. Sleep ensures that we have the mental sharpness we need in our jobs. It also makes us less susceptible to getting sick. 

Sleep deprivation can affect our personalities, coping skills, and ability to handle stress. Over time, it can change us, so we don’t remember our well-rested selves! 

We put a lot at risk when we run our careers on fumes. We may think we’re moving along just fine, but the people around us can see we aren’t operating on all or, even the right, cylinders. 

A successful career needs a base of positivism and consistency. Sleep deprivation starts to chip away at that. Here’s what can happen: 

1. Declining or inconsistent performance/productivity—Work quality and quantity starts to slip, a little at a time over time, especially on routine work. We start to save our mental alertness for the high visibility stuff, while our bread and butter work gets neglected.  
2. Pessimism about the job—Our attitudes become gloomy as our mental energy wanes. Others watch and start to doubt our commitment to the company and/or team. 
3. Little or no joy in accomplishment—We do a great job but even the praise doesn’t boost our energy. Instead we brace ourselves for the demands ahead, knowing that we’ll need to dig deep again. 
4. Annoyance with coworkers/the boss—Direction by the boss and actions by coworkers are viewed as just making our job harder.  
5. Being short-tempered, argumentative, and impatient—We have a hard time holding our tongue, even over trivial matters. Our fuse becomes short. People are put off. 
6. Inattentiveness and detail errors—We often make glaring mistakes that we’d never made before. We forget, overlook, and/or dismiss the details that are the hallmarks of quality work which don’t seem that important anymore.   
7. Doing unhealthy or inappropriate things to keep awake/alert—We start to make bad choices like too much caffeine, medication, and even illegal drugs. We may sleep on the job when our body just takes over. 
8. Feeling stressed out and edgy—We get jumpy, over-reacting to or with-drawing from demanding work, because we don’t feel in tune enough to cope. 
9. Fearful about the unknown and distrustful of colleagues—Our minds start to play tricks on us about who we can and can’t count on at work. We don’t interpret clearly or correctly the behavior and words of people around us. 
10. Declining self-confidence or self-esteem—We start to doubt our own capabilities. Conditions start to catch up with us and we’re too exhausted to problem-solve with a clear head. 

The nearly instantaneous remedy! 

Take a nap. Go to bed early for a couple of days. Recommit to a routine bed-time that gives you at least eight hours and stick to it. 

Learn to say “no” to all temptations to compromise your commitment to sleep. 

Your career relies on that choice and so does your life. Zzzzzzzzz! 

Photo from futureshape via Flickr

Know When to Fold ’Em | A Smart Career Strategy

Have a job that isn’t going anywhere? Reluctant to leave your work mates? Nervous about changing jobs? Join the club! 

A lot of people stay where they are, taking the avenue of least resistance. Unfortunately, it’s also the road to nowhere. So if you’re on it, get ready to exit. 

Being in a dead-end job isn’t the worst that can happen. Staying there too long is. 

We let ourselves get stuck in our jobs because of naïve or faulty thinking like: 

• If I do a good job, my boss will give me more challenging work.
• I work well with my co-workers, so I’ll probably be promoted to supervisor when there’s an opening.
• More training or college courses will advance my career.
• The productivity of my work team would suffer if I moved on.
• There really isn’t any other job that matches my skills and interests. 

These “beliefs” and our resistance to change paralyze our ability to move on. We worry that disrupting our own status quo could hurt not help our careers. Fear of the unknown is a powerful force. So we stay. 

Don’t measure “too long” by time. Measure it by the toll it’s taking. 

I confess. I am famous for waiting too long. Maybe that means I have a high pain tolerance, but I suspect that it’s simply my flaw. I’m getting better which is some consolation. 

When a job is hurting you, you need to get out. Here’s how I know: 

1. I took a desperation job as a switchboard operator at a brewery when I relocated to PA after five years teaching high school. I used an agency to get it. I was over-qualified, the job was brain-numbingly tedious, and the environment crushing to my self-esteem. I became so depressed that I’d come home from work and sleep for twelve hours.   

I stayed 4 months. If I could have stuck it out for 6 months, the company would  have paid the agency fee. I tried but couldn’t.  What a waste! (Even the beer was bad!) 

2. After the brewery job, I worked for a great non-profit with a dynamic executive director. I was responsible for grant writing, supervision of cooks and bus drivers, volunteers, parent meetings, and government surplus food. I averaged 50 hours a week, ran myself ragged, made a pittance, and knew it wasn’t right for me. When I thought about leaving, I felt guilty. 

I stayed for almost two years. When I left for a teaching job, five people replaced me. That was a lesson too. 

3. I was hired by a big utility company after another five years of teaching. I started as the energy education coordinator, built a department from scratch, hired terrific people, and became the manager. I was content there. 

I was offered a promotion as training and development manager in human resources. But I was reluctant to leave the program that was my “baby” and my work “friends.” 

My boss told me, “Being too attached to things you’ve done is a career trap. Don’t let that get in the way of your own growth. By moving on, you position yourself to continue to make a broader impact.” He was right. 

So after five years there, I moved on. 

It’s your career, so it should be good for you. If it isn’t, bolt! 

Remember: A job that:

• Crushes your spirit or makes you physically sick isn’t worth it. 
• Fails to compensate you for the value you add is a bad investment.
• Clouds your ability to embrace other opportunities is limiting.

 Jobs are about work that businesses need to get done to be profitable. It’s up to us to make sure that the jobs we accept fit our capabilities, work style, and expectations. If they don’t, then we have to decide to stay or go. Keep your business fitness bags packed! 

Do you have an “I stayed too long” experience to share? What held you back and then pushed you forward? Any words of encouragement?