“Living in Fear” at Work? Why? | Overcoming the Killer Consequences of Suspicion

Suspicion is our enemy. It spawns defensiveness, driving our optimism, courage, and self-confidence underground. And we let it.

As a consequence, we allow it to turn us inside out, then blame it for our woes.

Avoid fabricating backstories.

There’s no getting around the inevitable, ever constant change that’s the daily bread of business:

• The CEO announces that all employees need to be more accountable for their work output and then implements a company-wide training program to launch a new accountability culture.
• A couple of popular, high-ranking managers are let go for unstated reasons and ushered out without time to pack up their things.
• Organization changes are announced and long-time gurus of the business are passed over; younger, up-and-comers are given coveted, high visibility roles.
• Your boss reconfigures your job duties unexpectedly, requiring you to develop new technical skills.

These changes produce angst. What does it mean to our careers? To our ability to keep our jobs?

Most of the time we understand little at best about the reasons that drive these changes. The less we know that more suspicious become about what’s behind it all.

In the absence of information, we fill in the blanks ourselves, creating backstories that morph into dramas we accept as reality. So we tell ourselves:

• “My department is always blamed for late reports, so this accountability training is about us. I wonder whose head they’re after. Maybe I’ll be the scapegoat.”
• “One day the CEO talks about leaders having to be more flexible and the next day those managers are gone. I could be next.”
• “If they demote the managers who are the keepers of the company’s historic knowledge, that means they can’t see much value in what I know.”
• “My boss knows that I don’t have all the skills for my new job duties. It feels like I’m being set up to fail which could get me fired or displaced.”

We think self-composed, doomsday stories will prepare us for the worst. But they only drive us into an unhealthy state of “living in fear” of the Career Grim Reaper.

Focus on facts .

The notion of “living in fear” of losing your job or workplace status is self-imposed hyperbole, a desire to create drama in your head around the unsettling aspects of change.

We all tend to fear the unknown. So the antidote is information, the factual kind.

When facing changes at work, ask yourself what you actually know. Be careful not to accept as fact what your fellow employees are telling you, since they’re prone to fabricating their own stories based on supposition and hearsay.

Focus on what you’re contributing–your work output, behavior, skills, and willingness to adapt to change:

• Listen to what the leadership wants from you and determine how you can deliver it.
• Realize that when managers are let go, their release is not about you. Stay focused on your role and performing well.
• Recognize that the repositioning of employees in an organization is how new leaders and fresh thinking are fostered.  See those changes as clues to what you need to demonstrate to move up.
• Accept that the way you do your job will continually change. Instead of dreading new requirements and technology, be prepared to accept them.
• Be ahead of the curve by continually looking for ways to improve the way work is done.

Stay focused on the actual work you’re performing and the feedback you’re receiving.

Work grounded.

You can only control your own output and behavior. Although it’s important to observe what’s going on around you, getting caught up in the intrigue will only distract you from what you’re paid to do.

It’s easy to get drawn into the paranoia, doomsday projections, and soap opera scenarios of coworkers, but that’s a trap itself.

Instead, stick to what’s real–the work in front of you. Listen to direction that comes from the leadership and do your best to ride the change train to a successful career.

Photo from Razan alhammad via Flickr

Ready to Tackle Drama, Change, Fear, and Accountability? Follow 5 Reality-Based Rules.

I love a straight-shooter, someone who cuts through the fluff and excuses to expose the unvarnished realities of the workplace. That’s what I discovered with Cy Wakeman when I was invited to blog about the insights in her new book, The Reality-Based Rules of the Workplace. We may not like to see the sides of ourselves revealed in her pages, but the insights will makes us better, happier, and more successful.

A lot goes on around us at work. It’s easy to become oblivious to much of it until we get caught in the crossfire.

Too often our own naiveté about what our companies and bosses expect of us causes us to adopt attitudes and behaviors that are detrimental. To succeed we need to understand the realities that drive business and the often unspoken  rules that, when followed, will propel us in the right direction.

Face yourself.                                    

In her new book, The Reality-Based Rules of the Workplace, business consultant and speaker, Cy Wakeman, cuts to the chase on the behaviors that will make or break your success.

She gets it about why we are lured down the paths of wrong thinking and provides clear steps to get us back on track. She never deviates from the point that success is about how you and I choose to think and act.

Wakeman reminds us that:  

When you feel vulnerable, even defensive, it’s all too easy to blame the economy, political leaders, your boss–everyone except the one person you can control: yourself.

…no one is born accountable, self-reliant, self-mastered, and resilient, yet these are the qualities that count, the ones that will fill you with confidence….

To become what she calls  ”happy high-performers,” we need to take stock of ourselves. Through her self-rating checklists and strategies to increase your rating score, you can assess:

• Your current performance
• Your future potential
• Your emotional expensiveness (the cost of being a high maintenance employee)

To assess emotional expensiveness she asks if:

• “You are dramatic….
• You come to work in a bad mood.
• You share a lot of personal information with coworkers….
• You complain a lot, or judge others.
• You have an entitled or victim mind-set….”

With your answers in mind, she adds a positive perspective:

…good things come to those who are Emotionally Inexpensive. They are magnets for jobs, promotions, raises, and opportunities of all kinds.

Wakeman makes a strong point about the importance of determining where we stand in the context of our workplace, so we can build a career sustaining strategy.

She writes:

Meeting performance expectations is now the price of keeping your job. But it isn’t enough to guarantee you anything extra–recognition, benefits, or job security.

5 reality-based rules

It’s not uncommon for us to struggle to understand what’s really going on around us at work.

It’s also not uncommon to need help understanding the reality of our own behaviors: what’s driving us, who do we let influence our thinking, how do we overcome our fears, and what are we doing to enable our own happiness.

Wakeman’s five reality-based rules help you sort through the maze. Here are the rules and a peek at Wakeman’s insights about them:

1. Accountability determines happiness

You will get results when you stop…focusing on what is happening “to” you, and focus on…what you can do …to compete, to deliver, and to succeed.

2. Ditch the drama.

Without drama weighing you down , you will be free to make accountable choices, free of your stories and excuses, free of your and other people’s drama.

3. Action adds value.

If your motive is to stop the course of action or question a decision, change your focus from why it won’t work to how you can help make it work. Get willing, buy in, and use your expertise to mitigate the risks you see.

4. See change as opportunity.

Be ready for what’s next….Don’t let fear of failure stop you from trying.

5. Face extenuating circumstances and succeed anyway.

Confront conflicts early, calmly, and in a spirit of teamwork…Ask, ‘How can I help?’ Get clear on goals, roles, and procedures.

Aha moments

The road to career success is paved with aha moments and Wakeman provides a plethora of them in her book. You will find yourself, your boss, your coworkers, and many people outside of work there.

Understanding how your attitudes, behaviors, and self-deception can create toxicity is a powerful realization. Realizing and practicing a new and more savvy perspective enables you to see things with the clarity you need

Ready to Reboot Your Career? How “Reinventing” Worked for Me, More Than Once.

Careers can get old for a lot of reasons:

• Boredom when the work gets too predictable
• Declining fulfillment from achievements
• Disenchantment with a job going no where
• Curiosity about what’s out there
• Compensation ceilings that won’t meet future needs

I’ve experienced all of these at different times. Each one caused significant stress, confusion, and frustration–sometimes all at once.

I tried to force my way through them, telling myself that they were just temporary and would pass. But, of course, they didn’t and they don’t. The only way to get beyond these bumps is to change–not our favorite thing.

It’s not about reinventing your self.

Finding your way to a different career is not about reinventing who you are. Rather, it’s about redirecting your path so you can do work that fits who you are.

In my view, unless you are severely limited by problematic behaviors, trying to remake your essential self is an exercise that keeps you from going where you need to go.

Instead, redirect yourself by aligning your capabilities, interests, and energies to a more suitable line of work.

On the surface, this may sound pretty easy, but it isn’t. Each redirection means:

• Acclimating to a different industry and/or workplace
• Forging new relationships
• Adapting to financial impacts
• Dealing with potentially negative feedback from friends and family
• Fear, self-doubt, and a new learning curve

There is, however, something exhilarating about a big change, so long as you’re ready for it. Newness, discovery, and challenge have the power to put you in high gear.

Keep options open.

This is a timely post for me since I’m getting ready to redirect my “career life” again, building on and remolding the pieces that have served me along the way.

My career unfolded like this:

Primary Career Path: Teaching ► Management  ► Consulting

I love words and how they can help us deal with life. So with an undergraduate degree in English, I became a high school teacher. Over ten years in the classroom, I learned how to instruct, manage groups, handle multiple priorities, and influence change.

Eventually, I got bored by routine, frustrated by some decisions, and curious about the world outside the classroom.

I decided to learn about big business by asking to speak to managers in HR about how public education could do a better job preparing their future employees.

Those meetings gave me a comfort level with business people and led to my first job at a large electric utility. There I learned how to manage effectively and lead when the stakes were high.

I also learned how the business worked and where its weaknesses were. After 20+ years as a senior manager there, I’d achieved my goals and realized I didn’t want to go any further.

I left and started a consulting practice, an entrepreneurial venture that would have to support me. I had done some freelance consulting that prepared me for this new venture which has been ongoing since 2002.

Corollary Career Paths: Production ► Sales

I’d always had a dream to own a horse so I started taking riding lessons when I was 30. Eventually I bought and boarded two horses. I wanted to care for them myself,  so I bought a small farm that needed plenty of work, all of which was new to me.

Before I knew it, I was breeding horses (production) for the race track and the show ring. This was an entirely new and foreign industry for me which fulfilled my curiosity, challenged me intellectually, and increased my fulfillment for almost 20 years.

Concurrently, my horse enterprise led to ownership for ten years of an equestrian art gallery, where I learned about retail sales. This rounded out my business resume.

Together, all of these efforts to redirect my career have created a range of experiences I  continue to draw on. Fortunately, careers don’t have to come to an end.

What next?

Career management is our job. It takes introspection and exploration, a good bit of courage and some luck. As our careers evolve, we evolve with them, learning what really floats our boat and what doesn’t.

I still have my original love of words, that’s why I blog. I love the quiet beauty of my farm where I can think and unearth new perspectives free from distraction. I am seeking to uncover how I will redirect again. Ideas come to mind and then fade into others. The same will happen for you until the right answer appears. Let’s continue to keep our options open. I’ll keep you posted on my progress and hope you will do the same.

What’s in your mind right now about how you might redirect your career? What challenges do you face? Sometimes writing it down makes it clearer. I’d love to hear from you.

Insensitive, Divisive, or Self-Serving? Taking on Problem Behaviors | “You” Power

You experience them. You may even mention them–things that are done and said at work that aren’t right.

We don’t do our jobs in a vacuum. We have to interact with others. The attitudes and behaviors of our bosses, coworkers, and customers contribute to the culture of the workplace. They make it  consistently positive, negative, or a bit of both.

So what happens when you see and hear insensitive, divisive, or self-serving words and actions that don’t sit well with you? Do you:

• Keep silent (a signal of consensus)?
• Report it to the boss or HR for action?
• Complain to coworkers who feel as you do?
• Take action in your own way?

The power to affect change comes from within you. It takes a plan and committed, sustained action. The power of “you” can be formidable.

“You” Power

We often think that only management can fix what’s wrong with a company’s culture, even  when they’re a part of the problem.

We may think that sexism, bullying, antagonism between labor and management, and an everyone-for-themselves performance mentality are behaviors we have to learn to live with.

Sadly, that’s why these behaviors continue and escalate.

We all have positive role models we try to emulate. Now it’s our turn to be that positive example at work,  one day at a time.

We can each contribute to turning negative behaviors around by:

• Becoming a conscience for what is right
• Setting an example by what we say and do

It’s not for us to get on a soapbox necessarily, but simply to intervene, one-on-one in most cases, to call attention to a more positive way to communicate and act.

Consider personal objectives like these:

1. ) Increase awareness of language and actions that have overtones

When you hear language that’s sexist or ethnically insensitive, suggest a more appropriate  choice of words to the individual speaking or writing. Suggest that certain assignments be balanced between women and men.

In the hurry of the workplace, some coworkers may not be aware of the stereotypes they are promoting through their speech and assignments. Serving as a conscience has real power.

2.) Refuse to gossip

There’s always news that spreads throughout the workplace, but much of it can be hearsay, personal, undermining, and counterproductive. When we listen to or contribute to gossip, we become its agent.

Each time we decline to participate and offer our rationale for why, we influence one or more coworkers. That may lead to some to gossip about us, but it sets the right example, furthers your cause, and may also counteract some bullying.

3.) Discourage “us” v. “them” attitudes

Blaming can become rampant in organizations. It can target employees (us) versus management (them), employees in one group versus those in another, or you versus someone who, you believe, has made you look bad. Nothing good comes from blaming.

If you  believe in personal accountability, as I do, then you can wield personal power by always owning the outcomes of your work, being unwilling to enter into the blame game, and expecting others to also own their work. When they don’t, that’s an opportunity for you to raise their awareness.

4.) Quell complaining and venting

If coworkers know you will listen to their complaints, they will continue to unload on you. If, when they start, you say you’re too pressed for time to listen or call attention to what they did to create the issue, they will likely stop.

A great many complainers fill their days dumping their load on anyone who will listen. If you reduce their audience by one, others may follow suit.

A matter of time

 Making a difference takes time. The more ingrained the insensitive, divisive, and self-serving behavior, the more difficult it is to change. You have it in your power to influence other people. Whether it’s one or many, it just matters that you do what you can to have an affect.

Every action you take has the potential to inspire someone else to follow your lead or tap into their own “you” power. What could be better?

Photo from F-2 via Flickr

 

Dumb Stuff Happens If We Let It. Do You? | Change to the Rescue

Change fascinates me, so when I was invited to review and blog about Neil Smith’s new book, How Excellent Companies Avoid Dumb Things, I was all in and never looked back.

Do you gnash your teeth about:

• Procedures that don’t make sense and processes that weigh you down
• Managers who don’t/won’t fix things or crush new ideas
• Band-aid decision that don’t cure the problem
• Money wasted on products/services that customers don’t like

Well, you’re not alone.

Every company or department or work unit suffers certain inadequacies that get in the way.

The antidote is to make those “dreaded” changes that we know we need but often paralyze us.

But we can’t have improvement until we make change part of the way we work. So it’s time to buck up and do what needs to be done.

Pin-pointing the problems

Neil Smith’s book, How Excellent Companies Avoid Dumb Things, is a great place to start. His focus is in his subtitle, Breaking the 8 Hidden Barriers That Plague Even the Best Businesses. Get a handle on those barriers and you’re ready for action.

He starts out with this resounding observation:

How do I know that your company is like all the others? Because there are two things that every single company has: hidden barriers that prevent great ideas from surfacing…and employees with great ideas for how the company can do things differently.

His eight hidden barriers are:

1. Avoiding Controversy
2. Poor Use of Time
3. Reluctance to Change
4. Organizational Silos
5. Management Blockers
6. Incorrect Information and Bad Assumptions
7. Size Matters
8. Existing Processes

Neil covers each one with compelling observations that drive home the behaviors and attitudes that get in the way of improvements, growth, and change in the business. Then he includes fascinating and illustrative real-life examples of how each barrier plays out.

I’ve written frequently here about problem managers, so I was struck by his on-the-mark portrayal of barrier #5–Management Blockers.

He writes about managers who block improvement ideas suggested by employees:

  Good ideas can get shot down not for perceived lack of merit but because a manager feels threatened by them in some way:

• Fear of a boss’s reaction
• Fear of underlings shining
• Fear of losing power and influence
• Fear of having to do work

As a consequence of this barrier, he adds:

Employees are generally powerless in such situations.

Companies have to ensure there is are processes that allow ideas to be surfaced and considered in an objective way.

Neil advocates identifying all the barriers to change, both behavioral (he includes perspectives  by personality expert, Dr. Richard Levak) and business bottom-line, before crafting a change plan to turn things around.

The fix

Change isn’t easy, so Neil reminds us that everyone has to be in the game.

He offers “12 Principles for Breaking Barriers” to achieve the change that’s needed. His first two are, in my view, the backbone of them all:

Principle #1

 The process is personally led by the CEO and supported by senior management.

If the CEO does not take the change project seriously, no one else will. People need to think of the change project as the CEO’s own.

Principle #2

The entire organization is engaged–not merely involved–in the change process.

His reasons are:

1.  Everyone feels invested in the change process….
2.  Involving the whole company demonstrates that…every part of the organization is expected to contribute to the change.
3. Middle management may provide the big-dollar ideas, but small impact ideas matter.
4. Taking the entire organization through the change project at the same time creates a cross-organizational momentum that allows ideas to be considered and quickly resolved by the right people.
5. Just occasionally there is a brilliant idea…hiding in the workforce.

It’s about leadership

Effective leaders don’t accept “dumb things” taking place on their watch. Each of us, no matter our job title, is positioned to take the lead around our work. That means we each have an obligation to recommend and/or participate in change with full commitment.

Neil’s book is rich with insights and strategies, case studies and encouragement. At the very least, he helps you to see more clearly what’s really going on around you and a way to get the “dumb” out of the system.

The Coveted Manager Job–Grappling with a 3-Headed Monster

Finally, you’re a manager. You are now responsible for bigger things. The way you lead and the performance of your employees are what determine your value.

Pretty heavy stuff, eh?

We often covet those “big” job titles without knowing what’s expected. That old line, “Be careful what you wish for,” is a legitimate warning.

What a manager’s job looks like on the surface isn’t always what it is in reality. The sad truth is that when it’s your turn to be the manager, no one really tells you what you’re getting into. So you’d better ask.

Go on high alert!

No one wants their long-desired manager promotion to become a living hell.

In Greek mythology, the three-headed dog, Cerberus, guarded the gates of the Underworld so that no one (specifically, the dead) could get in or out without permission from the god Hades.

The better plan was to avoid heading hell-bound in the first place. The same is true when taking on a job as manager.

When it comes to hiring or promoting you as a manager, management is keenly aware of three things–your:

• Readiness and desire
• Knowledge and skills
• Fit with employees and peers

Management may or may not be right about you, but these are the criteria that they’re using to make the decision. In some cases management may or may not be effective themselves. So you need to be careful about how you hear and process their offer.

Demand to know.

All manager jobs are not created equal.

You need know what kind of work group, function, or cluster of departments you are to manage and whether you’re ready to grapple with the monster facing you.

Manager jobs essentially fall into three categories which means, to be effective, you need to know if you are cut out for the task.

1. Maintaining the status quo: When you take over a work group that works well together and consistently meets performance expectations, you need to be comfortable supporting the way things are being done. Your role is to keep the wheels turning, reinforcing what’s effective and collaborating with employees  on any fine-tuning.

If you’re one who is numbed by the warm hum of a well-oiled machine all day or can’t resist poking the sleeping beast just to get a rise out of it, then this manager role isn’t for you.

2. Fixing a mess: Work group dysfunction, poor output, and/or declining relevance are often reasons why you’ve been chosen as the new manager. In these situations, processes are often broken, performance management is lax, and innovation is dormant. Your role is to make big change, deal with resistance, and take risks.

If you hate conflict, lack internal political savvy, don’t know how to leverage relationships, and are unwilling to be personally accountable for your decisions, then you need to rethink this job. Fixing a mess is arduous and often slow, so you’ll need to do some soul searching and/or even defer this kind of challenge for a while.

3. Creating something new: The need to create a new department  spawns the need for a new manager. Sometimes a new product/service line is the reason or the need to expand or split an existing function. Your role is to organize, staff, and deliver results, dealing with doubters and managing expectations.

If you have a low tolerance for ambiguity, thin skin, fear of failure, and an inability to turn abstract ideas into concrete output, then starting from scratch may not be the best fit for you. When your manager job requires you to become an internal entrepreneur literally,  that role needs to be in your blood.

Tame the monster.

Managing a work group can be exciting and fulfilling, but, like every job, it needs to fit you. Every monster can be tamed so you have to be smart about the ones you grapple with.

So look hard at the manager job you covet and make sure you’re clear about what you’d be getting into. Then take on the challenge with all you’ve got!

Image from PEU Report

Leading Employees Who Don’t See Things Your Way | Handling Disagreement

Leadership is no cakewalk. It takes guts, resilience, clear-headedness, and sensitivity. Okay, it takes lots more too. But the real challenge for leaders is their employees. 

Each one has their own set of expectations. They want their leader to create a work environment that suits them by solving problems, removing obstacles, resolving conflicts, ensuring fairness, and minimizing disruptions. 

The harsh reality is: Every employee can’t have exactly what s/he wants. 

Disagreement triggers 

Like it or not, business needs trump employee wants. That can be hard to swallow if employees don’t understand the big picture their leaders see.  After all, a leader’s first responsibility is to keep the business going so we can keep our jobs. 

Savvy leaders anticipate decisions that trigger employee disagreement and are quick to defuse it. 

There are all kinds of causes for those disagreements: 

• Someone else was promoted and they don’t understand why.
• A work process was changed without their input.
• Work was outsourced, threatening their job security. 

Even though, you, as the leader, didn’t necessarily create these situations, you are expected to own them. Remember: you are the company’s agent even while you’re an employee in your own right. (Hey, no one said this role was easy!) 

Leaders need to identify signs of employee disagreement before they become flashpoints by being alert to: 

• Non-verbals: No eye contact, silence, avoidance, negative body language
• Verbal barbs: “I don’t think that’s fair” or “That’s not my job”
• Actions: Work slow-downs, huddled groups venting, non-compliance 

Resistance to new policies/processes, reorganizations, or increased performance expectations notoriously starts small and then takes on a life of its own. 

It’s tempting to ignore what might appear to be trivial employee disagreements. But they provide value insights that every leader needs to take seriously and reposition. 

When employees don’t see things your way, they act in either an overt or covert way. Some employees will be upfront and open about their disagreements; others will lie low and stoke the disenchantment of others. The leader needs to understand the root cause of these disagreements and tackle them head on. 

Defusing pushback 

Leaders tend to look at disagreements as pushback against their authority, which often isn’t the case. Too often, they are tempted to push back harder, using their organizational clout to make sure employees keep doing things “their” way. That only works for a short while and often makes matters worse.  

There’s real risk in failing to address employee disagreements like: 

• Declining morale and motivation
• Reduction in productivity and quality
• Inability to enact change successfully 

Leaders of all stripes need to moderate employee disagreements, resolve legitimate issues, build understanding, and keep lines of communication open. 

When employees disagree, they want to be heard. Sometimes this is all they need, an opportunity to go on record with their point of view. Other times, it’s the starting point for ongoing dialogue, helping the employee and the leader to resolve the disagreement. 

Here are basic steps for conversations with employees who don’t see things the leader’s way: 

• Understand the employee’s issue and its source
• Ask what the employee wants changed
• Be clear about your position and what you are able to give (if anything)
• Be prepared to explain your/the company’s rationale in words the employee will understand
• Confront the employee about their resistance (if any), its impacts and consequences
• Summarize what’s been discussed and state the next steps each will take 

The leader is not always right and the employee wrong. Effective leaders get important insights when employees disagree. 

Take the high road 

Disagreements are important for business growth; they constitute feedback. It’s the way disagreements are handled that separates great leaders from mediocre ones. 

Opening yourself to employee viewpoints and inviting them is key. Not every point of employee disagreement is valid or doable, but each should be heard and considered. 

Photo from stuant63 via Flickr

First Steps Are More About Your Stomach Than Your Feet | About Risk-Taking

I’m pretty sure you missed this post or forgot about it. It was my first, written two years ago, marking my foray into blogging. During my first month, I had 125 page views, now I get about 4,500 views monthly, totalling over 50,000 for those two years. I’m so grateful for every reader and subscriber, for all the wonderful comments, and for the chance to learn from you. Risking-taking is a path to growth and discovery. When we’re lucky, we get more than we hope for. I sure did. Thanks.

Sticking your neck out is scary. It’s a different kind of scary than maybe getting the a deadly disease or watching zombie movies or walking down an unlit city street at 1 AM. Taking risks that expose us to potential failure, criticism, embarrassment, or loss is personal.

Truth is: First steps take guts. They represent our willingness to acknowledge trial and error as our friend. But they can scare the pants off us, particularly when we really want things to work out.

What your belly knows that you don’t

Take this blog as an example. This is big first step for me. I’ve been writing my whole life. As an English major, I scratched out a ton of papers. I taught writing for ten years. As a corporate manager, I penned hundreds of memos, proposals, and strategic plans. As a consultant and coach, I’ve written magazine and newspaper articles, and had my book published.

So why did my stomach start to churn when I decided to become a blogger? Because it was a new format, a new audience, and a new kind of exposure, that frankly, I find scary.

My head’s answer to that was, “Don’t be ridiculous, you know how to write.”

My heart said, “Listen, my dear, it’s important for you to be courageous and offer useful insights to people building careers and small businesses.”

But my stomach said, “I’m not feeling too good. What if your big blog idea falls flat and you make a jerk out of yourself in front of a lot of people (most of whom you don’t and will never know) who, before this blog, might have thought better of you.”

The stomach can have a lot to say when you least expect it. And it can start to convince the head and the heart that the risk is too great and the potential discomfort not worth it.

5 ways to sass back!

To build a successful life, we need to get out of our own way. Calculated risk-taking is necessary to build the career we want or the business success that we need. Risks are about adventure and promise.

Each time we stick our necks out, we control how far. The more success we have, the bolder and more confident we become. Overcoming the obstacles imposed by our stomachs, in cahoots with our heads and hearts, are the challenges we face.

When you feel reluctant to take those first steps, ask yourself these questions:

What’s the worse that could happen? Unless the answer is death or financial ruin, then there’s no reason not to step out.

Have I done my homework? You don’t have to know everything about what’s ahead, but enough to have a realistic understanding of what you’ll need to do. If you have enough knowledge, skills, and experience to draw on, you’re good to go.

Am I ready? Take an inventory of your motivation, commitment, and energy level. Once you’ve got plenty in the tank, put things in gear and go.

Who’s there for me? Nothing beats a good support system, folks who are in your camp, ready with ideas, help, feedback, and healthy perspective. It doesn’t have to be a crowd, one good ally will do.

What would I do if I weren’t freaked about this? When we aren’t scared, we’re just out there doing the things we love and want to do. So if you want and love to do this thing you have before you (like this blog for me), then just do it. (Thank you, Nike and Socrates.)

I hope you enjoyed this blog post and will read those that follow. Yes, I’m still a wee bit scared but excited to have made the plunge. There are so many wonderful bloggers out there who have provided terrific approaches for me to model. Thanks for paving the way.

Do you have a first-steps experience to share? What are your tips for overcoming fears about risk-taking?

Photo from from useitinfo via Flickr

Got a Job That’s Crushing You? Lift the Weight.

As the year winds down, we often get reflective about the career situations we’re in and what may lie ahead. Hopefully, this repost from early in 2010 might help you reset your focus and get out from under.

Oh, boy, it’s exciting to get a new job, especially with a new company. Everything looks so promising. We feel really good about ourselves. You know: validated, reinforced, and successful.                                           

It’s amazing how our careers can start out in one place and morph to another. 

It’s all so gradual that we hardly know it’s happening until one day we realize that we’re someplace that we don’t want to be. Or, more often, a place that’s crushing us. 

I have a talented friend who was hired by a huge company two years ago in marketing communications. After a few months, the department downsized and the work doubled as sales needed more and more marketing materials to cut through the barriers of a tight economy. The demands on my friend accelerated. Other staffers weren’t pulling their weight. So her days got longer and longer. 

Has this happened to you? It has to me. I thought it would be my demise. 

Feeling trapped in your job, paralyzes your ability to make changes. 

Our jobs can’t trap us but we can convince ourselves that they do. After all, we go to work every day by choice. It only takes a letter or a word to say, “Bye, bye.” 

It’s really our personal situations that create the bind. When we have dependents, debts, health issues, and family commitments, we need to keep our jobs, even when they’re wrong for us. 

The demands of our personal lives, coupled with the stresses of our jobs, can drive us to an airless place. Here’s how we often feel: 

• · Exhausted and unable to think analytically
• · Defeated and unable to fathom any options
• · Imprisoned by the workload and the realities of our lives 

Truth is: There are always other options. They may require some creativity, planning, repositioning, and timing, but they exist. 

The struggle is: If you’re exhausted from your “work life,” the idea of exploring options, solving problems, and firing up your smothered optimism at the end of the day is too much. 

So what to do? Start small and focus on yourself. 

1. Make a list of the little things that make you feel uplifted (15 minutes of quiet time, an outing with a friend, a short walk, a few flowers in a vase). Give yourself at least one daily.
2. Make two lists about your job: Things I Have to Do and Things That Can Wait (Maybe Forever). Smart employees negotiate work output with their supervisors. If you don’t explain what can and cannot get done reasonably, your supervisor will expect it all. We are not mules unless we agree to be. Heehaw! 
3. Take a hard look at your personal situation and come up with ways to reduce your obligations and a timetable for how long you believe you need this job. Doing this will help you feel more empowered, since you’re now staying for your personal business reasons. (Your life is your business, remember?) 
4. Then, develop a career change strategy—one that you will implement while you still have a job. Do this with your timeline in mind and a focus on work that fits you. 

You always have options and choices. 

None of us much cares for change because it’s disruptive. We operate too often on the principle that “The devil we know is better than the one we don’t.” This can make us our own worst enemy. 

Small steps are important steps because they add up. The more you take, the farther you get. Each one helps you get more business fit. 

Getting help can be a really worthwhile investment. You’ll probably only need a leg up and then you’ll be on your way. I’m rootin’ for ya’! 

Do you have an “I feel trapped in my job” story to share or an “I escaped” one? Your story might help others.

Photo from sevgi.k via Flickr

Sizing Up Your Job—5 Signs It’s the Right Fit

A job is like any other relationship—it has its ups and downs. Some days we have nice things to say about it and on others we don’t.                       

Too often we’re likely to find ourselves among coworkers caught up in job frustration discussions. Most “I-hate-my-job” peer groups are eager to engage you as a new member. Every new complaint validates the old ones. 

Head for the hills! 

Negative associations drag us down. They’re like trying to swim against a rip current with your business suit on. 

We’re all better off looking at our jobs through a wide-angle lens. Our careers are built by each succeeding job, so we need to adopt a big picture view of where our current jobs can lead us. 

Not every job is worth keeping and not every company the right place. So it’s important to assess your job objectively to understand its true career heft. 

Start by inventorying what’s good about your job and then weigh those factors against what’s frustrating you. When you put the positives and the negative on a scale, you can see which side carries the most weight. You might be surprised at the gram weight of the good stuff. 

5 Good Signs 

We need to pay attention to the positive signs that our jobs are a good fit for us. Here are five indicators that your job is giving you what you need:  

1. Change energizes: When you’re in the right job, you see change as an opportunity. To you it means an exciting new problem to solve, obstacles to vault, creative solutions to discover, and growth opportunities to explore. (Think of Steve Jobs and his many Apple employees.)
2. Coworkers inspire: The people you work with encourage, motivate, and inspire you. They bring a spirit, humor, and can-do eagerness that bring out your best. A company that attracts people that you enjoy working with may be just the place to build a career. (Think of the sentiments expressed by the casts, past and present, from Saturday Night Live.)
3. Your ideas count: It’s enormously motivating to have your ideas heard, considered, and acted upon. Your boss may be a pain in some ways, but if s/he listens to you and is influenced by what you say, that means something. Jobs that allow for innovation can make a difference. So when you have one, there’s value in building on it. (Think of anyone you know who has a patent, a copyright, or program to boast.)
4. Reward is meaningful: Your value needs to be recognized both in tangible and intangible ways. A good job includes positive feedback (given privately or publicly), growth opportunities, a motivating performance appraisal, and fair compensation, including raises. Incremental reward is a positive sign that you’re in a good place and positioned to increase it. (Think of your job and salary history.)
5. There are places to go: Dead-end jobs are in many ways like broken promises. When you see that your job can become a springboard to different work you’d like to do, you have a sense of future. A satisfying career doesn’t just mean climbing the ladder; it also means successfully navigating the coastline. Meaningful work in good jobs with the support of good bosses can signal the right fit. (Think of Katie Couric, a one-time beat reporter, Today Show co-host, then a news anchor, and upcoming talk-show host.) 

Let the work guide you. 

Jobs are about work. If your work and the company don’t float your boat, your career will sink, go adrift, or take you so far out to sea you’ll feel lost. 

Chris Martin, lead singer for the British alternative, rock band, Cold Play, said about his job as a songwriter:”You have to work hard, but it’s not hard work.” When that’s our truth, we know we’re in a job that’s the right fit for us. 

Photo from omnos via Flickr